“If the energy I’m giving isn’t being reciprocated, I gotta back away”.
– a friend of mine, via rant at brunch, 2016
Let me tell you something. If there was ever a time when you could do some deep soul searching, laugh uncontrollably, and eat some great food, brunch is that time. I kid you not, brunch saves lives. In the midst of discussing relationships (of both friends and lovers) and life period, that quote up top bounced from the lips of my friend. Of course I gave her a nice little “yassssss” in that moment, but it still lingered in the back of my mind even hours after we left the table.
When was the last time you genuinely felt happy? Who or what made you feel that way? I’m not talking about a ten-second happiness. Not even a Saturday night turn-up happy. I’m talking about the kind of happy that keeps a smile on your face even on your lowest days, no intoxication necessary. That happy that you created, that you earned. Take a second… were you able to answer?
I don’t know about you but for me there is a such thing as floating on false happiness. It sits right next to cloud nine. Only much smaller. Grayer. Comes and goes. Many people claim that they are happy but haven’t felt that feeling in years. Things of right now are pleasant so folks are content, but happy? Far from. As humans, we often invest our energy into things that we think will make us happy and bring us joy. Once that person or thing hooks us in, we stick like monkey glue. And we stick. And stick. Even when the situation becomes unbearable, intolerable. We stay and settle because the situation was comfortable and brought us enough happiness to keep us “alright”. We tune out all the negative little things and compromise because those one or two aspects kept us happy. But we’re fooling no one but ourselves.
Today’s Keyword: initiative|iˈniSH(ē)ətiv| (n): the ability to assess and initiate things independently; an act or strategy intended to resolve a difficulty or improve a situation
In being happy, comes knowing when and how to take control of situations and your life. You don’t have to stay in an “okay” relationship. You don’t have to keep struggling to clock in at that draining job. If the situation isn’t making you 100% happy, go! Otherwise, you will find that the only one left miserable is yourself. Not only that, but stop looking for your happiness in other people. How dare you toss your problems onto someone else? My friend, get it together. People are not the reason you are unhappy. It just seems as such because you’ve given them that much control. Stop using life around you as your crutch and clean out your own soul. You must take the initiative to assess the life you are currently living and see what things need to be removed or altered. But it starts with you being real with yourself (a task most people still can’t face). You might feel stuck right now, but you don’t have to be forever.
You hold the power. Change your circumstance. Remove the toxins. Regain control. Find your happy.
So… when was the last time you genuinely felt happy?
Trying to answer that my damn self,